The one good thing...

The one good thing that has happened this summer is Jennifer and I got engaged on Tuesday (July 3rd). Unfortunately, since the Bar Exam is 3 weeks away, Jennifer and I will be apart for most of the time until then.

Coming soon to a Starbust package near you...

"Warning: These candys are chewy."

A woman in Michigan is suing Mars, Inc. (Starburst's maker) saying that chewing a starburst caused "temporal mandibular joint dysfunction." Apparently she took about three bites and her jaw locked up...now she has trouble chewing, talking, and sleeping.

Suprisingly, she's only suing for $25,000. She wants to make sure no one else suffers the same injury she did.

My question is how chewy is "chewy?" Additionally, would she have not eaten the candy if it said "Warning: this candy is chewy."

Worst Summer Ever

Well this officially can be the worst summer ever. Studying for the bar is the least enjoyable thing I've ever done. At any one time there are about 5 different subjects I should be studying. Law school was easy compared to this.

My super fun friend, ArtsyFartsyShopaholic, has "tagged" me to do something a la Myspace. I present - "The Fours"

Four Jobs I've Had:

• Lifeguard
• Tennis Instructor
• Office Runner
• Law Clerk

Four Movies I Can Watch Over and Over:

• Caddyshack
• Goldfinger
• Dr. No
• Animal House

Four Place I've Lived:

• Nashville, TN
• Knoxville, TN
• Elon, NC
• Cambridge, England

Four Places I've Vacationed:

• Panama City Beach, FL
• Naples, FL
• Melbourne, FL
• Oak Island, NC
  

Four of My Favorite Dishes:

• Anything with sweet potatoes
• Cranberry and Apple Casserole
• Homemade Macaroni and Cheese
• Fresh, Seared Tuna steak

Four Sites I Visit Daily:

• Facebook
• Myspace
• ESPN
• IMDB

Four Places I Would Rather Be Right Now:

• Beach
• Playing NCAA Football 2006 on the PS2
  
• At Wimbledon, preferably with Centre Court tickets
  
• In Bed
  

Four People I am Tagging:

• No one.

That's all folks.

The X Factor

Last night, as I was falling asleep, I happened to flip on MTV just as the new show "The X Factor" started. This masterpiece of programming fits right in with the ridiculous, yet strangely addictive, type of shows on MTV.

The premise is an ex-couple spends the weekend together at a swanky resort while their current significant others spy on them. Coincidentally, the exes often still have feelings for each other. Unaware that their current lovers are watching and listening to them, they generally act on these feelings. The show ends with the exes choosing who they want to be with - their ex or their current. Of course, even if they choose their current, their current may not want to be with them based on what they saw over the weekend.

At first I was shocked that they would create such a show, but it drew me in....I wanted to see how everything turned out.

Isn't it always a race issue?

Recently, while in Louisville attending the Derby and looking for the "real" killer, O.J. Simpson was asked to leave an upscale steakhouse. Jeff Ruby, the owner, said he didn't want to serve Simpson because he continues to receive so much attention. O.J. left without incident.

Now, O.J.'s attorney, Yale Galanter, claims the incident was about race. He plans to pursue the matter legally and possibly go after the restaurant's liquor license.

I'm sure Mr. Galanter is a good attorney and is probably pretty smart, but give me a break. A race issue?! News flash Yale - your client killed two people, owes millions of dollars to the families, and walks around like he's the King of England! This is definitely NOT a race issue!

I'm waiting for Al and Jesse to weigh in on this...

You don't see that everyday...

Jennifer and I, along with the rents, went to a fundraiser the other night for Junior League (Jennifer just joined). Part of the fundraiser was a live and silent auction. I saw something I have never seen, and probably will never see again, as part of any auction there. Ready for it? Are you sure?

One of the items on the silent auction was................a vasectomy. Yes, a V-A-S-E-C-T-O-M-Y!!! Suprisingly, no one bid on it.

At least it wasn 't part of the live auction...

All Done!

Well I am all done with law school! I had Remedies today. It wasn't too hard...open-book and notes - though I did write like a madman till the very end.

It's hard to believe that I am finished with law school. It seems like yesterday I was a nervous wreck going to my first day. Now...I'm done!

On to the Bar Exam. A job would be nice, too.

Job Situation #2

Well today I finally met with DWL concerning my job status at his firm. It went as expected, though not as I had hoped. I'll explain...

As I had guessed, everyone at the firm has been pleased with my work. I have gotten many compliments when I turn stuff in. Unfortunately quality of work doesn't always equal a job. I am interested in litigation, which the firm doesn't do a whole lot of. Apparently the firm recently had 3 big cases settle. A settlement is good for the clients but bad for the attorneys who need work (like me!)

Anyway, the firm has hired 2 summer clerks who are rising 3L's. Both are splitting the summer. DWL and I agreed that I would be "on-call" for any overflow clerk work that needed to be done. This will enable me to concentrate primarily on my Bar preparation. Then, in the fall, DWL and I will re-evaluate the firm's needs and see how they fit in with mine. I told him I'd be willing to continue as a clerk for a while...likely until I get my Bar results and, hopefully, become a licensed attorney.

So, as I said, it went as expected, but not as I hoped.

Would you turn a loved-one in?

Last night, while watching "Dog: The Bounty Hunter", Jennifer raised an interesting question. Seeing the families of the fugitives hide their loved-ones, Jennifer asked if I would turn her in if Dog was looking for her. I said I would. She said she would not turn me in. This resulted in friendly debate.

She admitted there is a double standard in her mind - she would turn in most people except for certain friends and family. She said it's a matter of loyalty. I said it's a matter of laws.

In my opinion, no one should be above the law...if you do the crime, you should do the time - no matter who you are.

That being said, I wouldn't immediate call the police and report it...I'd try to convince the person that they should turn themselves in.

What do you think?

No Job Update Yet

Well, it's Friday...however, DWL said he hasn't had a chance to speak with all of the shareholders in the firm yet. He's one busy little bee. So that, accompanied with the fact that I need to leave work early to turn in my paper and take-home by 4, means that I will have to wait till Monday to get some idea of my employment status.

Did I mention I'm nervous about it? I had to sit in my office and psyche myself up for 5 minutes this afternoon just to ask DWL about it. Basically, this job is my only current lead out of several firms that I talked to. I guess I'll just have to wait and hope for the best!

Finally Done!

Well, I finally finished both assignments I lamented about in my previous post. I am drained and tired, but I did it. I am not going to do any school work until I get my Law and Literature Take-Home Final on Tuesday. I can't wait!

Still waiting to talk with DWL regarding my job status. He seems quite busy today, I hope he hasn't forgotten.

Going out with a BANG!

Well...tomorrow I have my last two classes ever - excluding CLE courses, of course, and perhaps a course or two in beer-making. So, I guess it's more of my last two classes of "formal education."

Anyway, it's been a long run...19 total years of schooling, 7 of which were college. One theme throughout my career has been my proficiency at procrastinating. Occasionally I have done my assignments, papers especially, in advance and it feels great to have it done...but I still wait till the last minute most every time. So it's only fitting that, in my last weeks of school, I have once again procrastinated myself into a corner.

For several weeks now, I have know that I have a 10-15 page paper due at 5 P.M. on Friday for my Law and Literature class. I have even known my topic for a week or so. However, I have waited until this week to do it. Additionally, I have known for a week that I have a take-home final due at 4 P.M. on Friday for my Natural Resources Law class. Today we received our take-home and, to this very minute, I have done NO (repeat: N-O) work on my paper.

Therefore, I have 2 days to:

1) write a 10-15 page epilogue to Edgar Allan Poe's short story, The Purloined Letter (the paper)

AND

2) write my take-home (which consists of basically analyzing 2 recent Supreme Court cases).

Thankfully, neither of them should be very hard...just very time consuming!

Coincidence?

Today it was announced that Rosie O'Donnell will not be returning as co-host of "The View." This announcement comes 2 days after Rosie embarrassed herself at the annual luncheon of New York Women in Communications.

Apparently Rosie thought it was appropriate to make remarks such as dropping the F-bomb and stating it was always her dream to turn on an old, bald billionaire (read: the Trump-ster). Additionally, she made disparaging comments about Rupert Murdoch - news flash: NOT a good idea!

These comments were made in front of an audience including: Meredith Vieira, Arianna Huffington, Rupert Murdoch, Martha Stewart, Hillary Clinton, Judith Giuliani, Judge Judy, a former editor of Cosmo, the E-I-C of Jane magazine, and 17 high school girls (they won scholarships, or something).

Although I'm not offended by her comments (though her fat ass does offend me), they were certainly inappropriate for such an event. I wonder if it affected her contract negotiations. ABC is saying no, stating that they wanted her longer than she was willing to commit to.

Still, I'm glad she's gone!

Good ol' fashioned hate mongering...

Props to my friend Sam for bringing this nut to my attention:

"How we are going to exterminate white people"

The above link has the full video...it's about 9 minutes long. I encourage you to watch it all, but here is the astonishing end:

"Now how do I know that the white people know that we are going to come up with a solution to the problem. I know it because they have retina scans, racial profiling, DNA banks, and they’re monitoring our people to try to prevent the ONE person from coming up with the ONE idea. And the one idea is, how we are going to exterminate white people because that in my estimation is the only conclusion I have come to. We have to exterminate white people off the face of the planet to solve the problem. *tepid applause* Now I don’t care whether you clap or not but I’m saying to you that we need to solve this problem because they are going to kill us. And I will leave on that. So we just have to set up our own system and stop playing and get very serious and not get diverted from coming up with a solution to the problem and the problem onthe planet is white people."

How is this guy any different than, oh, a certain Adolf Hitler? Yes, racism still exists today, but preaching hate and "extermination" is NOT the answer.

The good news is even his own race is making fun of him:

"To the Wisdom of Kamau Kambon pt1"

"To the Wisdom of Kamau Kambon pt2"

The responses are hilarious and definitely worth watching!

Crying like a baby...

Isn't it funny how people talk a big game, but when the chips are on the table, they can't back it up? Case in point...the recent legal developments surrounding "Girls Gone Wild" mogul Joe Francis.

Francis has been sued by 7 girls previously "gone wild." The 7 girls were minors when they were filmed. Francis has been very uncooperative during settlement negotiations, reportedly losing his temper, using obscenities, and even calling U.S. District Judge Richard Smoak a "judge gone wild."

Yesterday, Francis appeared in Judge Smoak's room for a contempt hearing. He was sentenced to 35 days in jail and he cried like a baby throughout the 45-minute hearing.

Message to Joe: Grow a pair! It's 35 days...how do you think the convicted murderers getting LWOP feel?

Job Situation

For those that don't know, I do not have a job lined up for after graduation. However, there might be some new and exciting developments on Friday...more on that later. First, a history of my job search.

My intended future destination as a lawyer has changed since I first started. After two summers of running at a large, corporate, state-wide firm in downtown, I was a quasi-runner/clerk for a good friend of the family ("JHL"). He employed me during the summer before my senior year of college. This translated into clerking with JHL during my 1st and 2nd year summers (though 1st year was mostly Cambridge-filled).

Then one fine afternoon in late July/August last year, JHL asked me to meet with him regarding my future. Fully expecting a job offer there, I was surprised, but equally excited when he suggested applying for a judicial clerkship. Applications were sent and I had a few leads, but no offers from the judiciary. JHL then suggested looking at other firms, all the while being very ambiguous regarding my status with his firm. Though he was quick to put in a good word for me at other firms, none of JHL's recommendations panned out. Finally, I called an old friend and neighbor ("DWL") who happened to be an attorney in Knoxville. His firm needed someone to work during the spring, so I did, and have been doing that since about mid-January.

I have enjoyed my time with DWL and his associates and I would be happy, I think, as an associate there. From the beginning, I was frank with him and made it known that I was seeking a full-time position after graduation. Although I sometimes feel like clerks don't get much recognition (see "Something I've Learned" ), I have tried hard and turned out a satisfactory product. I have even received several compliments from attorneys. Over the past few weeks, as graduation has loomed, I have been tempted to follow-up with DWL regarding my status with the firm. DWL is a very busy man, so I have never felt right bothering him with it. However, today I did.

This afternoon, while sitting in my office, an associate of the firm asked me to prepare a memo. She asked me if I had time to work on it or if she should wait and give it to one of the new guys. Inquiring about "the new guys," she stated the firm was going to hire 2 summer clerks ( I don't think it is a bad sign for me since: (1) the clerks almost have to be 1Ls or 2Ls and (2) I will likely not be working a lot this summer because of the Bar Exam).

Anyway, I took that information as a sign that I needed to inquire about my own employment status. So, I asked DWL, and we are going to meet on Friday about it.

More about this on Friday!

It's a win-win situation...

In an article today, it was revealed that C-Lo would likely be a middle second-round pick in the NBA Draft. Although it delays Chris from making the $$$ another year, it is a win-win situation: Vol fans get to enjoy him for another year (read: increased hopes for a Final 4 ) and C-Lo's draft position should greatly increase with another stellar performance this upcoming season (read: eventually more $$$).

Personally, I am elated, especially since I don't give a rat's doo-doo about the NBA!

It's what separates us from the animals...

Sheryl Crow, in her infinite hippie-wisdom, has decided that people should stop using so much toilet paper. A day after meeting with Big Al in Nashville, she writes: "I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting." She continues "...I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required."

Good idea, Sheryl...better yet, why don't we do away with toilets all together?! That would save on all the water people use to flush them! Holes in the ground, here we come!

Something I've Learned...

Being a law clerk is kind of a shitty job. You have to do all the behind-the-scenes crap of the legal world, without any of the glory.

Think about it...You, the law clerk, are there to research legal issues. However, you don't usually get the easy issues because, if they were easy, the attorney would probably just look it up himself. Additionally, you are presented with the issue in the middle of the case, so you generally have very little context to work with.

If you find a case addressing the issue, great...you give it to the attorney, who then gets the kudos from the client for winning his case.

If you don't find the case, well you have to explain to the attorney that the search has been unsuccessful, but you know their thinking "What an idiot, how could he not find anything?"

Fortunately, I am graduating in 18 days and then - after the minor issue of the Bar Exam - I will be an associate somewhere, which hopefully includes more of the "representin'" and less of the "researchin!'"

Well, now I have a blog!

Alright, so since I am so addicted to reading several of my friends' blogs, I have decided to make my own. I figure that since I enjoy reading about other people's thoughts, maybe other people would enjoy reading about my thoughts.

ENJOY!!!